


if this is what it costs

by mydearsilhouette



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Choking, Dissociative Identity Disorder, M/M, Mental Instability, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Rough Sex, Smut, The Author Regrets Everything, bad clue au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:42:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27934069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mydearsilhouette/pseuds/mydearsilhouette
Summary: “It's unfair how I suicided as a result of my father’s torment, so miserably, yet my son–the ungrateful little fucker–took the chance to sneak into my love bed and replaced me.” Joonki, in Mingyu’s body, chuckles at Minghao's instant reaction. “And you, with your lewd body like a slut, welcomed him with your legs open, hole all warm and sweet. It angers me,”He tightens his fingers around the sensitive cock, Minghao shrieks in agony. “Your betrayal, my dearest vice president, I was so enraged by it that I didn’t leave. I stayed in his body to punish you, but you still call me by his name.”
Relationships: Kim Mingyu/Xu Ming Hao | The8
Comments: 2
Kudos: 52





	if this is what it costs

**Author's Note:**

> ha... ha... another product of impulsive thirst writing.... completely unbeta'd because i just wanted to finish writing and never look at my own filthy thoughts ever again :) please read the warnings before reading.... thank you.....

Minghao sits, legs spread open, on Mingyu’s lap, the latter’s hand wrapped around his cock. His breathing hitches and slows as Mingyu strokes his erection like a cat, trembles as he rides the tide of stimulus, almost reaching the high, then shrinks in erosive disappointment when his dominator pulls away. The cycle repeats itself, for minutes, hours, each one building on top of the other, making the next wave more unbearable. He has not been allowed to release for three days ahead of their, what Mingyu calls _training session_ , today. He’s losing his sanity.

The younger, fully dressed, has his hot cock pressed against Minghao’s hole under the spotless suit-pants. When he pulls his hand away for the 23rd time tonight, Minghao’s rationality finally fails him and cracks, tears gushing up to his eyes.

“Please, please,” his voice breaking up, breathless, begging, “Give it to me, I can’t do this anymore!”

“Yes you can,” Mingyu caresses the skin of his lover’s neck affectionately, “You’ve done it before, I know you can.”

“I haven’t gone for three days,” Minghao turns his head around to look at his torturer, “It wasn’t like this before, Mingy–”

The hand around his neck clasps, cutting off his airway violently. Minghao opens his mouth wide desperately but nothing comes through. “Got it wrong again, honey. It’s me, your Joonki-ah.”

Tears of pain streaming down his cheeks, Minghao wants to apologize and beg for forgiveness, but the hand is only grasping tighter and tighter that his drool is pooling up in his mouth, overflowing, dripping down from the corners of his lips, slithering backward down his trachea. He needs to cough it up to breathe. He needs to breathe. Let him _breathe._

“You feel the pain?” Mingyu, or who he really is, Joonki, whispers into Minghao’s ear nibbling the cartilage of it. “That’s how I feel, when you call me my son’s name.”

“I-” Minghao tries to use his vocal cords, but the single syllable is all he can make out. His pale hands clutch the fabric of the man’s pants, warning him of his closeness to his limit. Effective, the hand loosens up just enough for him to choke in the minimum amount of air to stay conscious.

“It’s so unfair,” Mingyu says, the spare hand swimming to warm up Minghao’s cock, slackened because of the abuse just now. “How I suicided as a result of my father’s torment, so miserably, yet my son–the ungrateful little fucker–took the chance to sneak into my love bed and replace me.”

The colors drained from Minghao’s face previously come back, an alluring pink rushing up to his cheeks as the stroking speeds up. Joonki, in Mingyu’s body, chuckles at his instant reaction. “And you, with your lewd body like a slut, welcomed him with your legs open, hole all warm and sweet. It angers me,”

He tightens his fingers around the sensitive head. Minghao shrieks in agony. “Your betrayal, my dearest vice president. I was so enraged by it that I didn’t leave. I stayed in his body to punish you, but you still call me by his name.”

“ ‘m sorry,” Minghao cries, “I’m sorry, sir, I’m sor–”

“Stop fucking apologizing!” the clutch on his neck suddenly releases, Minghao falls forward onto the office table and breathes in a way so intense that reminds one of a fish being thrown out of water. “It’s not his fault! Stop fucking torturing him!”

_Mingyu. It’s Mingyu back._ The hope that he’s saved now that his real lover has returned to control of the body makes Minghao feel safe, he lies motionless on the table, sobbing as Mingyu argues violently with himself.

“Torture? Can’t you see he enjoys it?”

“He’s crying! You are hurting him!”

“Pfft. His erection doesn’t say so.”

Self-hatred erupts when his body’s natural reaction to the abuse is pointed out. _No, no, he doesn’t like this. It’s just how he has been trained–_

“That’s all thanks to you, father! You are the person who turned him into this–”

“What? Slut?”

_Stop._

“Don’t call him that!”

“Then what do you want me to call him, whore? He can sleep with anyone as long as they pleasure him, because my poor baby can’t live a fucking day without men’s dicks inside of his ass.”

_Stop. Stop. Don’t fight anymore. Please._

“You–”

“Enough, Mingyu,” the more mature voice orders, “I’ve had enough arguing with you today. Plus my baby doll is still waiting for his release from me. Isn’t that right?”

Minghao mewls as Mingyu’s hand trails down his backbone teasingly, an action halted by the other hand almost immediately.

“Stop, you are fucking disgusting,” His boyfriend’s voice is shaking in anger, “You can’t shut me out of my own body.”

“Oh yes,” the other in his body laughs, “Yes I can. I hide my powers before Dr. Jeon for examinations just so he won’t think getting rid of me in your body is urgent. But really, I am way stronger than you think I am.”

A piercing headache penetrates Mingyu, he falls from the chair to the floor, holding his head, groaning.

“Stop, stop,” Minghao scrambles to kneel in front of the taller man, who wears the skin of his young boyfriend and carries the soul of his past lover. “Joonki, please. He’s your own son!”

“I don’t give a fuck about who he is!” A growl, furious, makes its way out of Mingyu’s broken screams of pain. “Are you begging me because it breaks your heart seeing the little fucker suffer?”

_Yes,_ Minghao says inwardly, _it fucking shatters my conscience seeing him tortured because of me._ But he doesn’t dare provoke the man any further. “No, no. You are the only one I love, Joonki. Please, stop, _I need you._ ”

“Hao?!” That’s his boyfriend, stunned and hurt by his words. But Minghao can’t care. He will do anything to protect the innocent boy from being physically harmed by his own father, who resides in and rules his mind.

Mingyu smiles, sickening satisfaction emerging on his twisted face. “That’s the doll that I miss. Pretty, submissive. You can’t live without me.”

“I can’t.” Minghao closes his eyes as his never-ending nightmare takes his full form, kisses him, blesses him with poisonous darkness. Mingyu is gone.

With another wet and messy kiss, Mingyu manhandles him onto the table, grounds his hands and feet to have his hole exposed in cold air. Scraping off some of the undried cum, he sends his fingers to be engulfed by the walls of Minghao’s flesh. Minghao moans, constrained, as the fingers begin to move slowly within him, turning and pressing adeptly.

“Sing louder,” he orders, and sing Minghao does. He will degrade himself and please, will do anything the man asks if that’s the only way to protect the one he truly loves.

Just as he’s about to reach his climax, the stimulus recedes altogether as Mingyu pulls out his fingers. It’s the 24th time. His hips rolling in unaddressed desire, Minghao cries and trembles, one hand reaching his own crouch since the other wouldn’t help him.

“I dare you,” Mingyu snorts as he watches Minghao struggle coldly. “If you want to pleasure yourself so badly, then do it yourself.”

As if shocked by electricity, Minghao’s hand retracts to where he held himself up. He lowers his waist and lifts his ass submissively, the way the man likes it, as he fights the dreadful emptiness that answers his want.“I’m sorry, sir… Please, please…. Touch me…”

Mingyu snickers. “Too late. You’ve pissed me off, pretty boy.”

_No, no. That can’t be._ Tears pool up again at the possibility that he will be left to himself, not allowed to come, for hell knows how long. “No, please! I– I can’t come on my own–”

A chuckle. “Look at how well I trained you. Completely dependent on me, aren’t you? Can’t even come on your own without my hands and my dick?”

“Yes, yes sir,” Minghao quivers at the truth that he doesn’t want to admit. “I, I need you–”

Pleased, Mingyu slaps Minghao’s ass cheek hard before dragging him closer by his ankle. Unprepared, Minghao yelps and falls flat on the table.

“Do you need me, or my cock?” Mingyu asks, pressing his hardness against the rim of Minghao’s soft, yearning hole.

Minghao moans, holding back the urge to send his hips backwards to be filled. “Both, both–Ah!”

Ruthlessly, Mingyu pounds into Minghao, hitting all the overly stimulated spots inside of him, fucking him to cry and scream. Oversensitivity makes every thrust unbearably painful, yet the idea of being able to come washes the clarity in Minghao’s head away. He moans and whines, tears and drool creating a swamp below his head as Mingyu pulls him up by his hair, choking him again and again. It feels good, it feels so good.

“Straighten up,” Mingyu demands, smacking Minghao’s failing thighs. Minghao, so close to coming, squeals, tries to hold himself up better to be fucked but in vain. With a click of the tongue, Mingyu lifts his lover up so that only Minghao’s arms are now supporting his weight.

“No, let me down–” Terrified by his own lack of control, Minghao begs, to which Mingyu doesn’t reply but instead rams into him more forcefully.

“I rather think you seem to like this, you are sucking me so much tighter,” he comments between heavy panting adjusting their postures, and his cock grazes over Minghao’s prostate unexpectedly, the latter screams and shakes as the walls of his hole contracts at the stimulus. “–Fuck!”

“Oh my god–” Minghao gasps, “I’m so close–please, sir, may I–ah! …come…?“

Another smack on his already reddened ass, Mingyu picks up his speed as an answer. About ten or more violently deep penetrations, Minghao shrieks, muscles all over his body twitching as he finally releases for the night. Clutching his wrists to pulls his strengthless body up, Mingyu finishes himself up with a few more thrusts, coming so much inside of Minghao’s overused hole that when he pulls out, the creamy, white liquid trickles down between Minghao’s thighs, mixing into the pool of Minghao’s own cum.

“That’s my good boy,” Giving Minghao’s abused cock another full stroke, Mingyu smiles and peppers his lover’s bareback with kisses when the latter collapses onto the table in pain.

_It’s alright,_ Minghao reminds himself, eyes closed, as he lies used and unattended in the cold. _If this is what it costs to protect him, it’s alright. I will be alright._

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for making it to the end:)))) if there's anything you wanna say, please feel free to find me on twt@machereombre or cc@mydearsilhouette <3


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